Joy And Sorrow

August has been a month of joy and sadness, joy because I´ve finally found a doctor who hasn´t just named but is also able to treat the severe daily headaches I´ve suffered since 2012. After numerous consultations with various specialists and an equal number of misdiagnoses my last hope was the pain specialist, Dr Hein, who within minutes diagnosed my condition as “coin headaches” so-called because the area of the pain is the size of a coin. This, he told me was not only a very rare type of headache but was also his speciality. Coincidence? I don´t think so. To cut a long story short, as I´ve always maintained myself, he thinks that the pain originates in my neck and I´ve been prescribed capsules which prevent the headaches from starting. He also gave me a prescription for manual therapy which entails a very gentle form of chiropractic manipulation. So far after 3 sessions my neck has twice made a noise like a twig breaking as misaligned vertebrae have slipped back into place and I can move my head more freely at long last. Even if this treatment doesn´t cure my headaches there are various others which may do so including, as a last resort, Botox injections. For the first time in almost 2 years I´m feeling optimistic which in itself is a cause for joy.

On the other hand, August has in other ways been a cause for sadness. All summer long I´ve seen only about half a dozen butterflies in my garden, by which I mean gaily coloured butterflies and not the destructive cabbage white. This is I think mostly due to a heatwave in April followed closely by a cold spell which killed all the less hardy butterflies which had been fooled into thinking that spring had arrived. During June and July I waited in vain for the usual brightly coloured fluttering around the Buddleia, commonly known as the butterfly bush. Only the cabbage whites appeared and I hardly saw so much as a hover fly or a bumble bee. August was my last hope but again I waited in vain. August is almost over and it´s rained practically every day. Many of my roses were struck by mildew as were the few lupins which had dared to bloom again out of season. Ditto my beautiful gerberas which spend the summer in pots on my patio. During the few sunny spells when I wasn´t busy spraying everything in sight with an anti-fungal mixture, I was lucky enough to manage to take several photos of, if not a butterfly, at least a few of my other favourite insects. This close up of a little hover fly feasting on a sunflower was a lucky shot. To me it gives an insect´s view of a beautiful alien world.

On an optimistic note, a rainy August hereabouts is often followed by a glorious Indian Summer. It certainly was last year though I couldn´t enjoy it when all the time I was just waiting for the painkiller to stop working and the headache to start tormenting me. The fact that it won´t happen this year is in itself a cause for joy.